DRUNKEN OBSERVATIONS...

Alright so we went to Marty Magee's for a night of drinking, debate, and possibly darts. Instead we had Guitar Hero II, the Eagles preseason game, and The Terribles performing live at Marty Magee's.

1) Bri is a scumbag for hopping on the Kevin Kolb Bandwagon. Bri spent the whole night talking about how Kolb had "moxie". What the fuck is moxie and how the hell can you have it if you play basically three full quarters and only score on your last drive. More like mediocre.
2) Do not entrust Brian with your money when there's tips involved. So Bri and I decided to order some food from Cornerstone, which is right down the street from Magee's. The delivery guy could basically walk the order down the street to Magee's. He didn't even have to walk... So hotshot Bri is carrying around a 50 dollar bill, which obviously the delivery guy cannot break so I decide to cover Bri's part, knowing he'd hit me back later. The bill comes to 11 something and I hand Bri $20 and tell him to tip whatever is needed. I hear the delivery guy give a hearty "Thanks Alot" and I know I've been screwed again. Sure enough, Bri gave a $7 tip for an $11 dollar delivery. HOLY SHIT WHAT HAPPENED TO 20%? So then Bri had to break his $50 at the bar and reimburse me what was properly needed. That's the second time Bri has messed with my money.
3) Dart sharks are scumbags.
4) Highlight of my night was being asked by Elliot of The Terribles as to whether I'd be interested in being their second guitarist. Dude I'd definitely be down for that since EWE TOO ROCKS ME is winding down and most of their songs consist of four chords. FUCK YEAH

pretty fruitful night down at Magee's.

NEW Dashboard album.... sure why not.

Dashboard Confessional's new album, "The Shade of Poison Apples" is coming out and it's a return to Chris Carrabba's original acoustic sound and I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty hyped to hear the album. I was disappointed in "A Mark, A Mission..." and the album that followed that but I'm definitely down for a return to Dashboard's roots. I've already listened to "Little Bombs" and "Thick as Thieves" on the band's myspace and the goods are definitely on display. I'll be the first to admit that back in high school, I was one of those 'woe is me' kids who ate up every word that Chris Carrabba and any other emo band had to offer, but listening to those two new songs took me back a little bit (don't worry I'm not crying in my room or thinking about slitting my wrists) to some of the best days of my life, high school. Plus, Dashboard was the reason that I bought an acoustic guitar and was able to eventually grow some balls and play open mics in front of people instead of just spending all my time playing along to mxpx songs in my room. So I'm going to represent and pick up this new album when it hits the streets on October 2nd.

Saban = Satan

As the NFL season approaches and I'm taking a look at the chances of my team, the Miami Dolphins, my hatred for Nick Saban has continued to increase. The man jumped ship on the Dolphins and left the team in shambles, after the whole Daunte Culpepper debacle. The worst part is that he lied about it the whole time. I hope he's a failure at Alabama and gets run out of the racist hotbed.

But back to the Dolphins. Had Saban still been in control for the draft, there's no way he passes up on drafting Brady Quinn with the #9 Pick. TED GINN JR!? TED GINN JR!? The Dolphins already had a pretty good return man in Wes Welker who they turned around and traded to the rival New England Patriots. All I have to say is that Cam Cameron's offense better be as high powered as the offense he had in San Diego next year. I want Ronnie Brown to be the second coming of Ladanian Tomlinson. I also came upon this picture on SI.com with the caption, "Only one letter separates Nick Saban and the king of evil, Satan." I would have signed my life away with "the devil" for a chance at an awesome team with Brady Quinn at the helm.

"CHOKE" the movie...

So I was checking out Chuck Palahniuk's (author of Fight Club for you simpletons who don't read books) website to see if his new book had come out and I found out that they're making one of my favorite Palahniuk books, CHOKE, into a movie starring Sam Rockwell, Anjelica Huston, and Kelly MacDonald, that hot Scottish chick from Trainspotting. I'm fucking psyched!!! If you haven't read this book yet, for the love of god read it before the movie comes out in 2008. Here's a little subplot of the book / soon to be movie:

Victor Mancini (Rockwell) is a medical-school dropout who has devised an ingenious scam to pay elder care for his Alzheimer's-afflicted mother: he pretends to choke on pieces of food while dining in upscale restaurants. He then allows himself to be "saved" by fellow patrons who, feeling responsible for Victor's life, go on to send checks to support him. When he's not pulling this stunt, Victor cruises sexual addiction recovery workshops for action, visits his addled mom, and spends his days working at a colonial theme park.

Professional Athletes are Morons

Why do athletes keep stepping forward and supporting Michael Vick? Stephon Marbury took it one step further and compared dogfighting to hunting, even calling it a "sport, except that it's just behind closed doors." MORON. Dogfighting is cruelty to animals. From the dogs inception, it is treated horribly, training it to become a fighter. Now granted, I'm not really a fan of hunting myself, but I don't think you can compare the two things. This whole fraternity of professional athletes is starting to get out of control. Stop sticking up for each other, learn the facts, and make an educated statement.

Golden Monkey beer kicked my ass last night...

I was feeling a little frisky last night, so I decided to purchase a $15.25 six-pack of Golden Monkey beer, the beer that is 9.5% alcohol by volume. BAD IDEA when you're spending the night playing drinking games. I had three Golden Monkeys and one of Sean's Red Stripe beers and I had an extremely good buzz going on. Once I got to that point, we all decided to head up to Marty Magee's for their One Year Anniversary celebration - we felt obligated because we've been with them from the start. So with that buzz going on, I proceeded to have a couple more Yuenglings and somebody kept buying shots for the group so I had a couple of them. With the DJ pumping some sweet jams in the bar, we ended up dancing the night away, stayed til way past Last Call, took a walk to Wawa and flipped out when Steph Schramm refused to let us walk her home. Apparently chivalry is dead. And then I just ended up heading home, pretty drunk at that point. I would have done a Drunken Observations post but I was only running on 5 hours of sleep so I passed out shortly after I got home. When I woke up this morning, it took me a full minute to even slightly comprehend where and what I had done last night. That was a long minute of nothingness. I also woke up with more money in my pocket then what I had last night. I may have been holding money for someone and never gave it back. So if it's yours please claim it. But anyway I recommend Golden Monkey as a casual drinking beer, don't mix it with drinking games, shots, and/or binge drinking. It can be the makings of a bad hangover.

Pat Benatar / Neil Giraldo show...

One of the many perks of my job at the radio station is that I get paid to attend concerts and I was certainly treated to an amazing show Thursday night at the Keswick when Pat Benatar and her songwriter husband Neil Giraldo came to town. I was a little skeptical at first being that Pat Benatar is now in her 50's, but she can still rock out with the best of them. It was amazing how many songs I knew as she ran through her catalog of songs. And her vocal range was off the charts so she is able to hit the highest of notes and some of the lower notes as well. So her voice was amazing and Neil Giraldo can still wail on the guitar as well and the acoustics in the Keswick are top notch so it sounded awesome.

Highlights of the night for me:
- Seeing a few women dressed up as the 80's Pat Benatar. It was straight out of Fast Times at Ridgemont High. And they were pretty hott as well... wink wink
- I'm pretty sure Marissa, who I was working with, was jealous because this girl probably in her early 20's with a nice rack was checking me out hardcore every time she walked by. I returned the stares and even prominently displayed my crotch as is the customary reply. Marissa aptly nicknamed her "Boobs McGee." But Marissa had me beat with the usual round of creepy old guys unsuccessfully trying to flirt with her.
- Being given folding chairs at the back of the theater to sit and watch the show. The people at the Keswick are always extremely accomodating to the MGK crew, even giving us free bottles of water.
- Pat Benatar has a ton of lesbians for fans. Everywhere I looked there were women that looked like guys. Tons of butch lesbians. One that stood out to me, was a woman wearing a t-shirt that said "Define Girlfriend". Yup she was a lesbian.
- Luckily there were a ton of scantily clad older women to offset all the women playing for the other team. Apparently concerts are the one time when moms feel they can just let loose, wear something provocative, get drunk, and then ask the guy working the MGK table if he wants to "booby-trap" them. Just another one of the perks of my job.

Ace Enders review on AbsolutePunk.net

Here's my review of the Ace Ender's show that I posted under the Music forum on AbsolutePunk.net

ACE ENDERS @ The Balcony

I went up to the Balcony @ the Trocadero on Wednesday, August 15th to see Ace Enders, former lead singer of The Early November, on his first solo tour under the monicker Ace Ender & A Million Different People. Opening for Ace were Pete Nischt, the first artist signed to Ace's Regular Music label, and Paper Rival, straight outta Nashville. This is my biased review of the show, I'm hopefully going to complete a formal review of the show tomorrow and probably post it on AbsolutePunk.net.

I arrived at the Balcony at 7PM, doors had opened at 6PM and the show was sold out so by the time I climbed the steps up to the venue, the place was packed and no band had even gone on yet. So I immediately made my way to the bar, grabbed a quick Yeungling and then went back in to catch the beginning of Pete Nischt's set. First let me talk about the crowd at the show tonight. Like usual, it consisted of high school girls with big hair, the usual scene kids who need to be seen, and an odd mix of some surfer dude preppy fucks. The crowd can be summed up by an encounter that this one girl had with Ace Enders. It wasn't even an encounter. As we're standing there waiting for them to set up the equipment for one of the bands, Ace just casually walks by, I notice everyone around me just seem to tense up, possibly there were some jaws dropping. After he passes, I watch this girl grab her cell phone and text a message that begins, "OMG Ace Enders just walked by me..." That sums up the crowd. Who gives a fuck if some guy from a band walks by you? It happens all the time. The only encounter I can remember from all of the shows I've attended was the time Tristan was tying his shoe and Kenny from The Starting Line tripped on him and Kenny said he was sorry. For some odd reason we found that hilarious and always tend to reference it in various conversations...

But anyway, the opening act was Pete Nischt, a self-described pop folk-rock singer song writer who's CD happened to be released this past Tuesday. His music kind of reminded me of John Mayer and his bassist was the spitting image of my friend Joe Julien if he wore glasses. The music was alright and Pete did something interesting with his acoustic guitar during the bridge of one of his songs - he sang into the accoustic. It was an intriguing effect to his voice. Very innovative I guess.

The second band was Paper Rival and it seemed to take them forever to get everything set up for their set. They seemed to be in a pissy mood from something that happened to them earlier in the day and that's not something you want to carry over onto your stage performance. And their lead singer seemed to be an asshole, but he seemed pretty cool after their set when I was talking to him over at their merch table. But once they went into their first song, the music was really good. The guitars seemed to have an effect similar to the one that The Killers use on their guitars and it gave them an atomospheric feel. And the singer's voice was pretty versatle. I bought their EP cd and listened to it on my way home and it was pretty amazing. According to the free stickers they were handing out, their first full length album will be out sometime this fall so keep an eye out. That's Paper Rival.

Finally, the closer, Ace Enders entered the stage with his accoustic. It was a family affair on stage, with his brother Dan playing bass, and his wife manning the controls on the iPod. As soon as the set began, it seemed like everyone in the audience had their cameras out snapping shots. I even managed to take a picture with my phone, although it looks pretty crappy as you can see at the top of this post. The show ended up being one of those once-in-a-lifetime experiences as the mood of the show was very laid back and casual. Ace didn't even have a set list, he was taking requests from the crowd and he even had some of the lyrics for his new songs written on some paper plates. He ended up playing a good mix of Early November songs, I can Make a Mess Like Nobody Else songs (his 1st side project), and new songs that may potentially be on his first release. Ace spent a lot of time in between songs, joking with the crowd, and interacting one-on-one with the people in the crowd. Highlight of the show had to be when he brought some kid out of the crowd to help him sing "1000 Times a Day" because he was having trouble remembering the lyrics towards the end of the song. The set ended with one of my favorite Early November songs, "Ever So Sweet", ironically a bittersweet ending to the show. He ended up playing between 8-10 songs and made the declaration that this tour would probably be the last time he would ever play Early November songs, which was highly disappointing. So I recommend getting tickets to the second show that was added at the Troc on Saturday, August 18th. It may be the last time you'll see Early November songs performed and you'll get to experience a highly intimate engagement. Can't wait for the new record to come out.

EWE TOO ROCKS ME's third show... SUCCESS

EWE TOO ROCKS ME's third show was held in my backyard on a beautiful Saturday afternoon and it was probably the greatest show we may ever play. We had an estimated crowd of 50-60 people consisting of my close friends, friends from the radio station, family, and Bill's contingent of friends. The show went off with hardly any flaws (obviously there are going to be some flaws in our playing because we are the best crappiest cover band around). Joe actually wore what could resemble a costume (he represented when he took off his shirt to reveal his extreme hairiness and Thug Life ways). Gooch played the part of the ninja pretty well, we hardly even knew he was there. Rhys definitely pulled off looking like a transvestite, all the way down to his Preston and Steve thong. Our special guest singer Bill had the stage pressence of a young Alice Cooper minus the guilltine which we couldn't find in time for the show. I had the greatest pair of sideburns and mustache a boy could ever wish for - I even garnered a nickname - "General Burnside", there was plenty of crotch to go around for everyone and I plan on exploiting my crotch even further in future shows with some even tighter wardrobe. In looking at the pics from the show, I've come to the conclusion that I have a sexy pair of legs. Huh? Huh? But yeah the crowd was actually there to see us and THEY LOVED US!!! THEY REALLY LOVED US!!!

It seemed like everyone was having a really good time, we kicked the keg in record time. I didn't really get a chance to drink anything because I was being an exceptional party host and because during the show, Rhys was being an asshole and kept throwing my beers into the crowd. I was able to acquire some groupies from the crowd after show, unfortunately one of the ladies, Er happens to be married and her partner in crime, Helen is very well taken. They sure had fun putting me in an awkward situation and watching me squirm (nothing sexual meant by this you perverts). But I realize it was all in good fun. There was also a lot of grab-ass going on after the show and I'm looking in TJ's direction on this one... So I'm going to go out on a limb and say this party was a success and the show was probably one of the best I may ever be a part of as an amateur musicians. Thanks to everyone who was a part of it and who came out and represented!! Enjoy a few of the highlights of the show. Feel free to add comments on your favorite parts of the show.


Dusty getting a crotch to the face from General Burnside


Check out those sideburns


Pattitude representing during Basket Case


A EWE TOO ROCKS ME show wouldn't be complete without fireworks and a dead baby

CHEATER

So Barry Bonds broke Hank Aaron's homerun record last night and it's just another black eye for Major League Baseball. Everyone knows that he took steroids but he still refuses to admit to it. Asked by one reporter at the postgame conference whether this record were tainted, Bonds responded, "This record is not tainted at all. At all. Period." Right...just keep on lying Barry, just like when you were before a grand jury and you said you had never knowingly used steroids. Oh you thought the cream you were rubbing on your arms was flax seed oil. Flax seed oil?! What bull shit. I hope Barry Bonds lies his way right to hell!

On a more comical note, how funny was it seeing Bud Selig's reactions at the game when Barry hit 755. He wanted nothing to do with this homerun race and it showed on his face and in how he reacted. At least he was classy enough to make an appearance and make some kind of previously prepared statement.

Finally, I'd like to thank Barry for providing me with one of the most entertaining Phillies games I've ever been to. Last season on Cinco de Mayo, myself, TJ, Coz, Sean, and Sean's brother Joe took in the game against the Giants with our traditional sombreros and TJ looking even more like a Mexican with a Corona poncho on. So while we were in the parking lot doing some hardcore tailgating, these high school kids had bought a foam oversized needle with the word "Cheater" on it and they were parading it around. Somehow, TJ was able to steal it off of them and smuggle it into the game. So we spent most of the game (we were eventually told to move on at some point in the game for directing some derogatory comments towards Tim Worrell)perched at the bullpen area in centerfield leading the "Cheater" chants with the foam needle. CLASSIC.

New Albums that I've Bought That You Should Listen to...

Here are some of the latest albums that I've bought or downloaded; They all come highly recommended:

The Starting Line - Direction
Evergreen Terrace - Wolfbiker
Tegan & Sara - The Con
The Almost - Southern Weather
All Time Low - Put Up or Shut Up
MXPX - Secret Weapon
Horse the Band - A Natural Death
Manchester Orchestra - I'm like a Virgin Losing a Child

I'll probably continue adding to the list as I remember all of the albums recently bought.